Welcome to my Etsy store!
I started this little side project to express myself creatively, as well as to combat the compounding, chaotic effect of late capitalism, which has plummeted the American middle class into a rapid death spiral, thus forcing me to make shoddy hand crafts to generate a supplemental income in order to put my kids through college so that they too can spend the rest of their adult years as wage slaves in a broken system.
About My Products
Explore my latest range of hand painted fireplace mantle signs, which are an expansion of my wildly popular “Good Vibes Only” collection. These shabby chic pieces will bring warmth and individuality to any overpriced Craftsman bungalow.
“Unpredictable Lactose Intolerance” Vibes
“I Owe An Unspeakable Amount Of Late Fees On Library Books I Never Finished” Vibes
“I’m Embarrassed By How Quickly I Just Ate That Value Meal In My Car While Driving” Vibes
“Actually, Woman At Old Navy, Leggings Are Pants And That’s A Hill I’ll Die On, You Misguided Female Misogynist” Vibes
“For The Love Of God, Why Do You Type LOL At The End Of Every Text” Vibes
“Oops, I Haven’t Changed The Oil In My Car In Two Years” Vibes
“I’m Secretly Jealous Of My Parents’ Cat Because He Gets To Freely Nap Without Consequence” Vibes
“Oh God! Is That A Serial Killer Or A Racoon In My Garbage?” Vibes
“Why Does Chronic Procrastination Feel So Good While Also Being Utterly Destructive, Oh No I’m Basically A Heroine Addict” Vibes
“I Never Go To The Doctor So I Probably Have A Dormant Blood Disease” Vibes
“I Don’t Have A Living Will So I Hope I Don’t Die Suddenly And Unexpectedly From This Blood Disease” Vibes
“You’re Using The Term Marxism Incorrectly But I Won’t Correct You Because You Have A Great LinkedIn Network That I May Need One Day” Vibes
“I Know This Shirt Is A Little Too Lowcut For This Situation But Honestly That’s Why I Picked It” Vibes
“The Other Day I Doubted The Existence Of A Higher Power And It Made Me Feel So Guilty That I Emotionally Ate A Stale Chocolate Bunny I Found In My Son’s Toy Box” Vibes
“Ask Yourself Why You’re The Only Person Who Thinks I Have Resting Bitch Face” Vibes
“When I Recycle It’s Purely Peformative But At Least I’m Recycling” Vibes
“I Instagram Every Egg I Poach Because That’s The Only Thing I Know How To Cook” Vibes
Each mantle sign is $14.99 + tax + shipping charges.
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